读后续写 （2020高三“读后续写”教研资料）.ppt

1、读后续写读后续写 浙江省 经典续写案例 红楼梦红楼梦 曹雪芹 高 鹗 争论点：契合度高低争论点：契合度高低 文 学 家文 学 家 ：情节发展情节发展是否和原八十回一致是否和原八十回一致 语言学家：语言学家：用词用句用词用句是否和原八十回一致是否和原八十回一致 融洽度融洽度 原叙事文本原叙事文本 续写高效度结尾续写高效度结尾 读读 猜猜 两个要弄明白的问题： 原文原文有什么用？有什么用？ 续写续写要写什么？要写什么？ 原文原文 理解理解 续写文续写文 模仿模仿 素素 材材 素素 材材 情节情节 基调基调 核心核心 矛盾矛盾 故事故事 框架框架 语言语言 设定设定 潜伏潜伏 信息信息 样题情节和语

2、言特点分析 (1)(1)情节基调情节基调的铺设：的铺设：“向心性”“向心性” (2)(2)核心矛盾核心矛盾的预设：的预设：“发散性”“发散性” (3)(3)故事框架故事框架的搭建：的搭建：“顺延性”“顺延性” (4)(4)隐含语言隐含语言的定位：的定位：“一致性”“一致性” 情节基调 “A funny thing happened to Arthur when he was on the way to work one day”。 funny: “趣”“趣” A funny thing cause amusement, laughter, etc. (有趣的，可笑的有趣的，可笑的) 向心性向心

3、性 Money or Other things 核心矛盾 “情节核”“情节核” the young man or another man Thief Not thief 矛盾身份矛盾身份 矛盾中心矛盾中心 关键人物关键人物 发散性发散性 箱子里箱子里 所属人所属人 Young man 身份身份 可能情节发展可能情节发展 1 Money the young man thief 碰巧抓住抢劫犯（即结尾1） 2 not thief 碰巧把刚从银行取钱赶路的人当劫犯，最后 到警局传来抓到劫犯消息 3 another man thief 碰巧碰到一个刚偷了其他人钱的小偷，最后 到警局传来抓到劫犯并找回银

4、行失钱的消息， 最后在Arthur帮助下抓到另一个小偷 4 not thief 路遇一个路人帮人搬运装满钱的行李箱，而 Arthur错把路人当劫犯，最后澄清消除误会 5 Other things the young man thief 错把普通小偷当劫犯，最后帮助抓到该小偷 6 not thief 错把路人当劫犯（即结尾2） 7 another man thief 碰巧碰到一个刚偷了其他人东西的小偷，最 后到警局传来抓到劫犯并找回银行失钱的消 息，最后在Arthur帮助下抓到另一个小偷 8 not thief 路遇一个路人帮人搬运普通行李箱，而 Arthur错把路人当劫犯，最后澄清消除误会 故

5、事发展 时间：时间：on Arthurs way home 地点：地点：along the Park Avenue near the First national Bank 背景：背景：a long loud noise of an alarm from the bank a young man Arthur Run after Stop, stop! ? To the PS 顺延性顺延性 故事框架 Paragraph 1: As he was running, Arthur heard the young man shouting behind, “Stop, stop!” _ Paragr

6、aph 2: The taxi stopped in front of the Police Station and Arthur. _ 顺延故事发展顺延故事发展 创意故事结尾创意故事结尾 顺延顺延 逆转逆转 语言定位 记叙类故事文记叙类故事文 文文 体体 叙事叙事 文本文本 叙事叙事 人称人称 叙事叙事 时态时态 叙事叙事 方式方式 第一、二、三人称第一、二、三人称 旁白旁白/ /对白对白 口语口语/ /书面语书面语 选词用词选词用词 句式选择句式选择 一致性一致性 语言定位 记叙类故事文记叙类故事文 叙事人称：叙事人称： 比如，比如，he, she, it, A funny thing,

7、the young man, Park Avenue, Arthur等等 叙事时态：叙事时态： 用过去式或者与过去式相关的时态（直接引语除外）用过去式或者与过去式相关的时态（直接引语除外） 比如比如 was on the way, walked, was surprised, started to run等等 叙事方式叙事方式： No trouble at all, what happened Go to the police station, Stop stop, Help help。 “第三人”的身份讲述“第三人”的身份讲述（第三人称作为主语第三人称作为主语）（直接引语除外）（直接引语除外

8、） 转述过去某个时刻所发生的事转述过去某个时刻所发生的事 旁白旁白+ +对白（间接引语对白（间接引语+ +直接引语）直接引语） 主次分明主次分明 语言定位 记叙类故事文记叙类故事文 叙事文本定位叙事文本定位： 一组数据：一组数据： 结尾1（153） adv or prep (behind, suddenly, until, obviously, already, later), verb (might, realize, continue, jump, race like the wind, learn, open, expected, describe, caught), noun or n

9、oun phrase (a large sum of money, information) 结尾2（158） behind, directly outside behave, realize, drive, follow, describe, voice, innocent, embarrassed, faster 语言平实易懂的小故事语言平实易懂的小故事 小词、常用词以及常见短语小词、常用词以及常见短语 12个个新新词词(组组) 18个个新新词词(组组) funny amusing，intriguing，diverting VS. 语言定位 记叙类故事文记叙类故事文 句式选用句式选用： 行

10、为动作行为动作： “主语“主语+谓语动词谓语动词+宾语”宾语” 材料 Everyone had a different answer 结尾 The police caught the robber 事物状态事物状态：“主语“主语+系动词系动词+表语”表语” 材料 Arthur was surprised, Park Avenue had been quiet a moment before 结尾 The man shouting behind is the bank thief, The man was innocent “清楚明晰地讲故事”强调故事人物的行为和思想变化“清楚明晰地讲故事”强调

11、故事人物的行为和思想变化 语言定位 记叙类故事文记叙类故事文 句式选用：句式选用： 一组数据： 材料材料：12个含and的并列句式， 结尾结尾1(1531(153字字): ): 6个并列句式；结尾结尾2(1582(158字字):):7个并列句式 主从复合主从复合句句( (以时间状语从句为主以时间状语从句为主) 材料材料：when he was on the way to, As he walked along, After placing it on the , Just as Arthur picked up 结尾结尾：As he was running, The moment he go

12、to, Just as Arthur was describing 时间提示词如at the moment, then, later等。 主从复合句少，并列复合句多主从复合句少，并列复合句多 故事一环承接一环的时间发展和动作的延续 读后续写策略 情节基调情节基调 核心矛盾核心矛盾 框架完整框架完整 顺延逆转顺延逆转 语言文体语言文体 遣词用句遣词用句 情节走向情节走向 合情合理合情合理 的创意的创意 不着痕迹不着痕迹 情节内容情节内容 框架结构框架结构 语篇段落语篇段落 1 1、挖掘情节基调，廓清核心矛盾，创造合情合理的创意故事外延。、挖掘情节基调，廓清核心矛盾，创造合情合理的创意故事外延。

13、2 2、理清叙事角度，把握顺延逆转，构建张弛有度的完整情节框架。、理清叙事角度，把握顺延逆转，构建张弛有度的完整情节框架。 3 3、定位语言文体，模仿遣词用句，续写不着痕迹的语用叙事文本。、定位语言文体，模仿遣词用句，续写不着痕迹的语用叙事文本。 读后续写策略 “读后续写”与阅读课的契合 单元单元 课文课文内容内容 M1U3 Travel Journal Journey down the Mekong M2U4 Wildlife Protection How Daisy Learned to Help Wildlife M3U2 Healthy Eating Come and Eat Here

14、 M3U5 Canada “The True North” A Trip on the “True North” M4U4 Body Language Communication, No Problem? M5U3 Life in the Future First Impressions M5U4 Making the News My First Work Assignment “Unforgettable”, Says New Journalist M7U2 Robot Satisfaction Guaranteed 虚拟 故事 “读后续写”与阅读课的契合 1. M3U2 Come and

15、eat here 2. M7U2 Satisfaction Guaranteed 思维思维+ +语言语言 虚构虚构+ +趣味趣味 “读后续写”与阅读课的契合 Come and eat here WP + his empty restaurant Visit to YHs + got the problem Do research New sign and discount Competition was on What if with no research or no findings? What if WP just copy YHs idea? 一个可能需要增加的阅读环节一个可能需要增加

16、的阅读环节 信息梳理 Friendly cooperation Hostile competition Peaceful coexistence + 思辨发散思辨发散 alarmed, disturbing, trust “读后续写”与阅读课的契合 Satisfaction Guaranteed 信息整理信息整理+ 思辨发散思辨发散 Claire Tony Gladys accompanied, protected, help envy A sense of failure Curtains opened +A party A sweet victory A sense of loss Wha

17、t if? Curtains closed Still victory? Loss? Tonys Report? 两篇文本（节选） Wang Peng sat in his empty restaurant feeling very frustrated. It had been a very strange morning. Usually he got up early and prepared his menu of barbecued mutton kebabs, roast pork, stir-flied vegetables and fried rice. Then by lun

18、chtime they would all be sold. By now his restaurant ought to be full of people. But not today! Why was that? What could have happened? Claire didnt want the robot in her house, especially as her husband would be absent for three weeks, but Larry persuade her or allow her to be harmed. It would be a

19、 bonus. However, when she first saw the robot, she felt alarmed. His name was Tony and he seemed more like a human than a machine. He was tall and handsome with smooth hair and a deep voice although his facial expression never changed. 两个语篇的文本比较： Satisfaction Guaranteed Come and eat here 旁白旁白+ +对白（旁

20、白为主）对白（旁白为主） 书面语书面语+ +口语口语 简单句式，小词常规词简单句式，小词常规词 行为变化行为变化 全旁白的形式全旁白的形式 全书面语形式全书面语形式 复合句式，较高级词汇复合句式，较高级词汇 情绪（心理）表达情绪（心理）表达 叙事人称：第三人称；叙事人称：第三人称； 叙事时态：叙事时态： 过去式过去式 叙事顺序：以时间发展叙事顺序：以时间发展 结尾方式：出人意料结尾方式：出人意料 Satisfaction Guaranteed Come and eat here A week later, Wang Pengs restaurant was again quite full a

21、nd he felt happier. He smiled as he welcome the customers warmly at the door but the smile left his face when he saw Yong Hui walking in. She didnt look happy but glare at him. “May I ask what you were doing in my restaurant the other day? I thought you were just a new customer and now I know that y

22、ou only came to spy on me and my menu.” she shouted. The night of the party arrive. The clock struck eight. The guests would be arriving soon and Claire told Tony to go into another room. At that moment, Tony folded his arms around her, bending his face close to her and inspiring her with confidence

23、. Then the front door bell rang. Tony freed her and disappeared from sight. Until then did Claire get self- prepared and dare to face the surrounding of the guests. The women, along with a new but seemingly quite elegant face, were impressed by Claire, the house and the delicious cuisine. 一个困惑的问题？ 高考评分标准重融洽度的同时，高考评分标准重融洽度的同时， 会多么关注语言的文采？会多么关注语言的文采？ Thanks！ Enjoy our job, Enjoy our life!