高考英语作文续写ContinuationWriting课件.pptx

1、Continuation Writing 阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。(2016(2016年年1010月浙江高考试题月浙江高考试题)One weekend in July,Jane and her husband,Tom,had driven three hours to camp overnight by a lake in the forest.Unfortunately,on the way an unpleasant subject came up and they started to quarrel.By the time they reached

2、the lake,Jane was so angry that she said to Tom,“Im going to find a better spot for us to camp”and walked away.With no path to follow,Jane just walked on for quite a long time.After she had climbed to a high place,she turned 示例around,hoping to see the lake.To her surprise,she saw nothing but forest

3、and,far beyond,a snowcapped mountain top.She suddenly realized that she was lost.“Tom!”she cried.“Help!”No reply.If only she had not left her mobile phone in that bag with Tom.Jane kept moving,but the farther she walked,the more confused she became.As night was beginning to fall,Jane was so tired th

4、at she had to stop for the night.Lying awake in the dark,Jane wanted very much to be with Tom and her family.She wanted to hold him and tell him how much she loved him.Jane rose at the break of day,hungry and thirsty.She could hear water trickling(滴落)somewhere at a distance.Quickly she followed the

5、sound to a stream.To her great joy,she also saw some berry bushes.She drank and ate a few berries.Never in her life had she tasted anything better.Feeling stronger now,Jane began to walk along the stream and hope it would lead her to the lake.As she picked her way carefully along the stream,Jane hea

6、rd a helicopter.Is that for me?Unfortunately,the trees made it impossible for people to see her from above.A few minutes later,another helicopter flew overhead.Jane took off her yellow blouse,thinking that she should go to an open area and flag them if they came back again.注意：1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右；2.应使用

7、5个以上短文中标有下划线的关键词；3.续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好；4.续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。Paragraph 1：But no more helicopters came and it was getting dark again._ Paragraph 2：It was daybreak when Jane woke up._ The underlined words Character:Tom,JaneSetting:yellow house,stream,lake,helicopter,at a distanceAction:walked,clim

8、bedMood:to her great joyBeginningClimaxEnding quarrel吵架，生气离开 看见直升飞机angry(helicopters)rescued?被救？Processlost 迷路confused，tired构思细读两段续写的开头语，理顺续写段落的逻辑关系；围绕划定的10个关键词，合理创新故事情节。Para.1:But no more helicopters came and it was dark.续写部分：续写部分：简当时的感受？简当时的感受？简是如何过夜的？简是如何过夜的？简睡着了吗？简睡着了吗？Para.2:It was daybreak whe

9、n Jane woke up.续写部分：续写部分：简获救了吗？谁救了简？怎么救的？她当时的感受？注意一、所续写短文的词数应为150左右（词数少于130的，从总分中减去2分）；二、应使用5个以上短文中标有下划线的关键词语，少用1 个扣1分，少用2个扣2分，少用3到4个扣3分；三、续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语，少划1个不扣分，少划2个到3个扣1分，少划4个扣2分。第五档续写例文 But no more helicopters came and it was getting dark again.Feeling disappointed,Jane had to stay alone

10、for another night.After walking a long distance again,it occurred to her that she had a box of matches with her.She was wild with joy and used them to burn some branches so that she could get some warmth.Staring at the jumping fire,Jane thought of all the things that she and Tom had experienced toge

11、ther.Only in this way could Jane feel better and fall asleep.It was daybreak when Jane woke up.Feeling refreshed,she continued to walk along the stream to find the way out.At noon,to her great joy,she finally caught sight of a wide water surface at a distance.It was the lake!Also she spotted a crew

12、of policemen seeking along the bank!It seemed that they also spotted her because they were moving towards her!It was Tom who called the police.Finally,they led her to her husband.And the minute they met,they hugged together firmly as if they would never separate again.They got home and have led a ha

13、ppy life ever since.【点评】该文为最高档五档作文该文为最高档五档作文2222分。分。第一、续写部分和原文及首句的融合度高。第一段开第一段开头头Jane had to stay alone for another night一句中的一句中的another night说明作者理解了原文中说明作者理解了原文中Jane已经度过了一已经度过了一夜的事实，又为下文她睡着了埋下了伏笔，从而和第夜的事实，又为下文她睡着了埋下了伏笔，从而和第二段又二段又衔接衔接上了。第二段开头作者说，上了。第二段开头作者说，Jane感觉精力感觉精力恢复了，与段首所说的醒来呼应。恢复了，与段首所说的醒来呼应。

14、【点评】第二、该文内容丰富。增加了增加了a box of matches和和jumping fire，极有画面感；同时，在第二段，极有画面感；同时，在第二段，Jane看到了平静的湖面、警方的活动和他们见面后的喜看到了平静的湖面、警方的活动和他们见面后的喜悦等细节都描写得悦等细节都描写得很生动很生动。另外，在情节的推进方。另外，在情节的推进方面，作者在第一段续写面，作者在第一段续写“生火生火”和第二段续写的开和第二段续写的开头头“继续前行继续前行”使故事复杂化，然后使故事复杂化，然后完成故事完成故事（看（看到湖面、警察和到湖面、警察和Tom）。）。第三、该文基本没有语言错误，达到了语法和词汇的准

15、达到了语法和词汇的准确性；在词汇和语法的丰富性上，作者使用了确性；在词汇和语法的丰富性上，作者使用了occur，wild with joy，refresh，caught sight of，spot，the minute等词汇；在语法结构上，作者使用了现在分词等词汇；在语法结构上，作者使用了现在分词feeling disappointed，staring at the jumping fire，主语从句，主语从句it occurred to her that和和it seemed that，as if 引导的状语从引导的状语从句，倒装句，倒装only in this way could Jane

16、.，在续写中体现出，在续写中体现出了较高的语言运用水平。最后，在连贯了较高的语言运用水平。最后，在连贯性性方面，作者使方面，作者使用了用了and，also，after等词将上下文的逻辑体现了出来。等词将上下文的逻辑体现了出来。【点评】读后续写的具体要求 提供一段提供一段350350词以内词以内的语言材料，要求考生依的语言材料，要求考生依据该材料内容、所给段落开头语和所标示关键词据该材料内容、所给段落开头语和所标示关键词进行续写（进行续写（150150词左右词左右），将其发展成一篇与给定），将其发展成一篇与给定材料材料有逻辑衔接有逻辑衔接、情节和结构完整情节和结构完整的短文。的短文。2续写的短文

17、字数为150左右；4续写完成后，请用下划线标注你所使用的关键词语。续写部分分为两段，开头已经为你写好;1应使用短文中5个以上标有下划线的关键词语；3RequirementsRequirements：“PRS”StrategyProblem-Result-Solution Step 1 Read for elementswho when where why what howRead for plots Beginning(character and setting)Process Climax(the main problem or conflict)Ending (a time to solv

18、e the problem /how things end up)Para 2 Problems:Results:Solutions:Step 2 Creative PlottingPara 1 Problems:Results:Solutions:Underlined words:When:Who:What：How:Tip 1Key Words.Tip 2 consistent logicPossible results/solutionTip You can get your writing polished by using advanced phrases&structuresvivi

19、d verbsnecessary inner thoughts natural transitional wordsStep 3 DraftingWhat details can be added to enrich the outline?Tip To enrich the plot,we can add_,_,_,_,etc.actionsemotions(looks)surroundingsdialoguesWhich group do you favor?-First,besides/plus/additionally/furthermore,whats more,-fortunate

20、ly,unexpectedly,surprisingly,happily for him,Inspired by,Out of curiosity/Driven by curiosity,Apparently,needless to say,immediately,in an instant,insteadStep 4 Polishing and writing*about 15 sentences withright punctuation and grammar*positive,logical,reasonable,well-connected*neat and beautiful ha

21、ndwriting*Dont forget to underline the key words you have chosen.2读后续写的高分攻略评分标准第五档：21分-25分第四档：16分-20分第三档：11分-15分第二档：6分-10分第一档：1分-5分第五档：21分-25分 与所给短文与所给短文融洽度高融洽度高，与所提供各段落开头语，与所提供各段落开头语衔接合理衔接合理。内容丰富，应用了内容丰富，应用了5 5个以上个以上短文中标出的关键词语。短文中标出的关键词语。所使用所使用语法结构和词汇丰富，准确语法结构和词汇丰富，准确，可能有些许错误，可能有些许错误，但完全不影响意义表达。但完全

22、不影响意义表达。有效地使用了语句间的连接成分，使所续写短文有效地使用了语句间的连接成分，使所续写短文结构紧结构紧凑凑。与所给短文融洽度较高，与所提供各段落开头语衔接较为与所给短文融洽度较高，与所提供各段落开头语衔接较为合理。合理。内容比较丰富，应用了内容比较丰富，应用了5 5个以上短文所标出的关键词语。个以上短文所标出的关键词语。所使用的语法结构和词汇较为丰富、准确，可能有些许错所使用的语法结构和词汇较为丰富、准确，可能有些许错误，但不影响意义表达。误，但不影响意义表达。比较有效地使用了语句间的连接成分，使所续写短文结构比较有效地使用了语句间的连接成分，使所续写短文结构紧凑。紧凑。第四档：16

23、分-20分第三档（11分-15分）与所给短文关系较为密切，与所提供各段落开头语有一定与所给短文关系较为密切，与所提供各段落开头语有一定程度的衔接；程度的衔接；写出了若干有关内容，应用了写出了若干有关内容，应用了4 4个以上短文中标出的关键词个以上短文中标出的关键词语；语；应用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务的要求，虽有一些错误，应用的语法结构和词汇能满足任务的要求，虽有一些错误，但不影响意义的表达；但不影响意义的表达；应用简单的语句间的连接成分，使全文内容连贯。应用简单的语句间的连接成分，使全文内容连贯。第二档（6分-10分）与所给短文有一定的关系，与所提供各段落开头语有一定与所给短文有一定的关系，

24、与所提供各段落开头语有一定程度的衔接；程度的衔接；写出了一些有关内容，应用了写出了一些有关内容，应用了3 3个以上短文中标出的关键词个以上短文中标出的关键词语；语；语法结构单调、词汇项目有限，有些语法结构和词汇方面语法结构单调、词汇项目有限，有些语法结构和词汇方面的错误，影响了意义的表达；的错误，影响了意义的表达；较少使用语句间的连接成分，全文内容缺少连贯性。较少使用语句间的连接成分，全文内容缺少连贯性。第一档（1分-5分）与所给短文和开头语的衔接较差；与所给短文和开头语的衔接较差；产出内容太少，很少使用短文中标出的关键词语；产出内容太少，很少使用短文中标出的关键词语；语法结构单调、词汇项目很

25、有限，有较多语法结构和词汇语法结构单调、词汇项目很有限，有较多语法结构和词汇方面的错误，严重影响了意义的表达；方面的错误，严重影响了意义的表达；缺乏语句间的连接成分，全文内容不连贯。缺乏语句间的连接成分，全文内容不连贯。续写中常出现的问题一、书写一、书写潦草潦草，卷面，卷面涂改涂改；标点使用随意。；标点使用随意。二、二、上下文的上下文的连贯性连贯性差差；三、表达粗糙，用词不准且单一，句式简单，三、表达粗糙，用词不准且单一，句式简单，口语化严重口语化严重四、四、情节设置缺乏逻辑性，续写的内容发散太宽情节设置缺乏逻辑性，续写的内容发散太宽五、五、与所给短文及段落开头语的与所给短文及段落开头语的衔接

26、程度衔接程度差差；六、没有使用六、没有使用5 5个或个或5 5个以上个以上原文中的划线词语，没有划出所原文中的划线词语，没有划出所 用的划线词语。用的划线词语。获得高分的写作技巧Tip 1:故事要围绕着主要人物展开。故事要围绕着主要人物展开。Tip 2:详细刻画角色及其情感。详细刻画角色及其情感。Tip 4:使用恰当使用恰当的修饰词以使描写更加生动。的修饰词以使描写更加生动。Tip 3:使用恰当的衔接词以使故事更有连贯性。使用恰当的衔接词以使故事更有连贯性。Tip 5:做到首尾呼应以使故事更加有条理。做到首尾呼应以使故事更加有条理。Tip 6:确保第二段和第一段的衔接有逻辑。确保第二段和第一段

27、的衔接有逻辑。1.The smog covering the city was as thick as _.(simile)2.The child raced through the house _.(simile)3.The sun _ your skin with glowing warmth.The flowers _ in the spring breeze.(personification)4.Good painting is _;it can be tasted,but not explained.(simile)5.Reading is to the mind what _ is

28、 to the body.(metaphor)6.Time is _.(simile)kissesnodlike good cookingexerciselike lighting short and passing fast a fur coatlike a gust of wind1.她试图掩饰自己的愤怒。She tried to _.2.泪珠顺着她的脸颊滚落。Tears _ her cheeks.3.他的这番话引起了一片叫喊声,有震惊,也有愤怒。His statement led to _.4.福里斯特盯着他的汽车,气得浑身发抖。Forester stared at his car,_.

29、hide her angerrolled downcries of astonishment and angertrembling with angerThe exhausted hiker dragged his legs along the country road.The old man sprang from the chair,stormed out of the house and slammed the door behind him.After failing the exam,Alex let out a sigh,crumbled the test paper into a ball and tossed it into the dustbin.It was bitterly cold.All the birds flied south,and even the snow turned blue.